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I’m Sick and Tired of All This White Bullshit

The snow!!  Oops, I meant to post a pic of a snowflake.  Eh, too lazy to change it.  I swear I’m not racist, I’d hate snow if it were any color (except whatever color my skin is).  It’s just that I’m sitting out here in New England, where, historically, olivey-brownish guys like me get held READ MORE

The Chooser

Several weeks ago, I was walking down the street and I passed a homeless man panhandling. I took in his pitiful situation and thought to myself “what if I…. Helped him?” Anyway, here’s the result of that one-off thought experiment: a sketch starring and put together by some of my comic friends. It’s the season READ MORE

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When Someone Tells You “You Suck” :/

I’ve been doing comedy for seven heart-wrenching years, but been doing the human being thing for a soul-crowbarring 30.  And yet, I still have no clever response to a meanie dropping a “you suck” bomb on me.  And I hear it all the time, whether it’s an attack on my comedy while on stage or READ MORE

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3 Secrets I Used To Go Viral

So I’ve gone viral AGAIN! (The first time being when I got infected in May, see last post). More recently, a video of mine went viral on one of the highest-trafficked websites in the world (arguably the universe), World Star Hip Hop! For those unfamiliar with the self-dubbed “#1 urban outlet,” CBS News describes the READ MORE

I’m Palestinian, My Roommate is Jewish

My roommate and I wrote and filmed this sketch a few years ago, but some friends I showed it to shot it down. So we never released it. Suddenly, it’s topical, so f*@k those friends. Enjoy.

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Doctor Tells Me I Have HIV

Some of you are expecting a joke here.  Like HIV stands for “Hilarious Internet Vegetarian” or something stupid like that.  No, this time there’s no joke.  Last week at a Kaiser in West Covina, I was told that I have HIV. It’s not easy for me to put this into words, and it all happened READ MORE

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Day 949: I’m going to quit comedy and become a motivational speaker

It’s official. I’ve decided that comedy is not for me. Many of you think this is a joke, but it’s not. I never wanted to be a comedian. Since grade school, people would tell me that I should be one, and I entertained the idea of it in my head, but never thought, “thats my READ MORE

abearica

Day 908: Lebanese guy buys 10 of my shirts

Growing up in Fremont, California I was not exposed to any Lebanese people outside of my family, and family friends.  Many ignorant people assume that because Fremont is loaded with Afganis, Indians, Pakistanis, and Persians, that I fit right in, but I did not.  Lebanese is a whole nother ball park.  We are on the READ MORE

Day 672: Arab One-Percenters

I know I’m going to sound like someone who hates their own race here, but my god! This was a painful set. More for them than for me, since I do this all the time. I’m getting cold stares in the beginning from people of the same culture as me. The are finishing up dinner. READ MORE

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Day 341: Buried by Jo Koy

Have you ever attended a proper burial? Well over 350 people did tonight at the Irvine Improv. First night of the weekend, featuring for my homegirl Anjelah Johnson. Two shows tonight, both sold out. On the first show, the monstrous Jo Koy stops by to see Anjelah, and might as well do a guest set, READ MORE

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Day 314: Marc Maron Finally Talks to Me

After opening for him for for three days…Marc Maron finally opens up to me. He seemed talkative the first night I met him but, he just didn’t really talk to me. It started when I walked in the green room and he was deep in conversation with Nato Green, who was middling. They were talking READ MORE