Day 588: Louis CK calls me a ‘genius’ and then ignores me

Posted on by

Opened for Louis CK, who is hot on the market right now. People are calling me up congratulating me and talking about how far I’ve come and using words like ‘proud’ and ‘jealous’ and ‘free tickets?’ My answer to all were ‘no’. I am warned Louie doesn’t like to talk to the openers, which is convenient because I don’t like feeling obligated to talk to someone anyway. We do 3 shows, and he doesn’t see my first set, but he sees the second, and right before the third show he says ‘good set’. I say thanks, and then I go up and have a good third set, but one joke falls flat. Coincidentally it’s my flat tire joke “I got a flat tire next to a homeless man. He’s like ‘can you spare some change?’ I’m like ‘can you change a spare?'” I’m not gonna lie and say it always works, but the laughs were pretty unreasonably low for it. After my set, I cross paths with Louie and he just looks at me. I feel like I’ve shamed him. Then he goes up and immediately says to the crowd, ‘And fuck you guys for not laughing at Sammy’s flat tire joke. It’s genius. That concept has been sitting there for years and he was the first one to take it. I’d like to see you guys write something better.’ I’m backstage in awe, and then he tries to do the joke, totally butchering it ‘Spare tire? Spare..’ but the crowd is laughing like no other. I’m pretty flattered, and then I go to get him off stage at the end of his set and he goes right back to ignoring me.